8 years later, you're still here with me
by aftercolony
Summary: Suzaku Kururugi, some Suzaku/Lelouch, spoilers to end of R2 --- After 8 years of peace, Zero meets someone unexpected in the Britannian capital one afternoon.
1. Chapter 1

'Zero' walked slowly down the east wing hallway of the Britannian capital, his signature cape floating behind him as he picked up his pace. The day had been long, full of endless meetings for The 100th Empress Nunnally vi Britannia, which as always, included him accompanying her to every single one. Not that he cared either way, it was how things were now and he had no other will than to protect Nunnally and serve the role he was supposed to as Zero. As was his promise to-

He missed a beat in his step as he looked up to see a small boy skipping through the hallway, his black hair a mess on top of his head. He must have been the child of one of the ladies of the court, he thought to himself as he stopped and allowed the boy to make his way closer.

The boy, no older than eight or nine stood in front of him, looking up into his masked face; his round cheeks flushing in awe. "Zero…"

"L- Lelouch..." The name he hadn't allowed himself to utter once since that day fell off his lips in an inaudible whisper and he was suddenly left short of breath. It was if he was back at the Kururugi Shrine all those years ago, meeting Lelouch for the first time again. Though the boy's eyes were more on the blue side and he didn't come anywhere near to holding himself the same way his former Emperor had when they had been young.

He knelt down in front of the boy, who still had not said a word outside of his name since their meeting. "Hello there." He finally found enough strength to speak normally to the child, even though the urge cry and hug the boy felt overwhelming.

"Hello, Mister Zero." The boy's gaze turned down to the floor and 'Zero' watched as his hands balled up into little fists; something he remembered quickly that Lelouch had done when he was nervous or upset as a child.

"What is your name?" His voice softened as nostalgic feelings bubbled inside him.

"I- I'm Andre."

'Zero' tried his best to hold off a laugh. That name didn't seem fitting at all for such a young boy or for one with such a spitting image of his best friend for that matter.

"It's nice to meet you, Andre." He held out his hand for a handshake but the boy ignored it as he suddenly looked up, a serious look on his face. This boy really was Lelouch, he smiled to himself; never so glad to see such an expression on a child before.

"Mister Zero, I know, I know my Mama has told me I shouldn't ask anyone about this but, what- what is your name? My sister keeps telling me that 'Zero' isn't your real one."

Under any other situation he would have stood up and walked away, telling the boy his sister was wrong and he was only Zero now and no one else. But instead he found himself reaching up to the confiding mask, enjoying the fresh air hitting his face as the mask slid off; shaking long bangs out of his face. His green eyes sparkling for the first time in years.

He watched the boy gasp, his mouth opening into a small 'O' and cheeks turning even redder as 'Zero' reached his free hand up to tussle the boy's already wild hair.

"You can call me, Suzaku….. Lelouch." He smiled, but he could feel the tears already running down his cheeks and he could do nothing but force a laugh. The boy watched with wide eyes, confused as to why Zero was crying and why he had just been called the name of the Tyrant Emperor.


	2. Chapter 2

He was outside in the palace gardens with Nunnally, enjoying the newly blooming perennials which Nunnally had picked out herself during the rebuilding of the capital. The smell of pollen was strong and even through his mask, he should feel allergies begin to tickle his nose.

His eyes glanced over to the sunflowers on the far end of the garden and he felt childhood memories returning. Nunnally had asked him what flowers he would like to see in the garden and he suggested sunflowers first. They reminded him of that peaceful summer when he had dragged Lelouch with him to go see Mount Fuji. It had been amusing to watch Lelouch have so much trouble keeping up with him and climb up hills. That was the one thing he always one-upped Lelouch on.

"Suzaku." Nunnally's voice called him out of that memory and he turned around to face her. He frowned behind his mask, not liking that Nunnally insisted on calling him by that name.

"Your majesty, please call me Zero."

"Why are you so intent on acting like you aren't Suzaku around me? I know what my brother and you did, and you aren't dead to me, Suzaku."

He shook his head in defeat. It mattered not how many times he told her that he couldn't be called Suzaku Kururugi any longer, that man was dead. Even when they were in the privacy of their own company, it felt as if he was breaking his promise to Lelouch when he allowed her to do as she pleased.

Lelouch.

But that boy who was like looking at an old photograph, he didn't mind that boy addressing him by the name of a dead man. It seemed normal. It felt as if Lelouch was there calling his name once again and everything that had happened was only a nightmare.

He heard Schneizel call for Nunnally, there was some business to be taken care of and he turned to lead her back into the palace.

"No Suzaku. I want you to enjoy the flowers more. It's probably just more paper work that needs to be done anyway. Enjoy the fresh air for once." She smiled at him with those wide her wide blue eyes, before walking slowly back towards the palace. Years of slow and painful physical therapy had granted Nunnally the ability to walk once more and 'Zero' felt as if he had done something right in helping her through the steps of recovery.

He pulled off his leather gloves as he walked further into the garden, finally stopping in front of a large stone water fountain. He placed the gloves on a bench as he walked closer, letting a hand lazily dip into the water, enjoying the cooling sensation. He always felt overheated in this outfit, he doubted he could ever get used to it. It was part of the burden he had to carry, he guessed.

He heard laughter and looked up through the waterfalls to see a familiar silhouette.

"Su-! Mister Zero!" Andre ran quickly around the fountain noticing 'Zero' immediately; stopping himself from calling out the name that was only to be used, "very secretly."

"It's a surprise to see you Andre." 'Zero' patted the boy on the head while he held up his hands for 'Zero' to see what laid in them.

"Look Mister Zero! I found a bunny in the garden!"

'Zero' sat down on the bench, removing his mask and smiling. "You can use Suzaku now, Lulu."

"Yay! Our secret nicknames!" The boy ran in a circle, holding the defenseless rabbit in his small arms before collapsing onto Suzaku's lap with the animal.

"What should we name him? I wonder where I could keep him in my room?"

Suzaku laughed and shook his head, picking the rabbit up in his hands, half expecting it to bite into his hand. "I don't think it would be a good idea to keep him Lulu. Rabbits need to live outside."

Lulu huffed, unsatisfied with being told no. "But-"

"You can't keep him, what about his family? You wouldn't like to be taken away from your Mama or Papa would you?"

"No…"

"Then let's put him back where you found him." Suzaku stood up, leaving his mask and gloves behind as he walked with Lulu further into the denser part of the garden until they reached their destination.

"Here is where I found him…" Lulu pointed down at the base of the tree, small tears dancing on his eye lids.

Suzaku sighed, placing the rabbit onto the ground, watching it hop away quickly before reaching down to Lulu and lifting him up onto his shoulders. "Don't cry now, you can come see the rabbit whenever you want to. You know, I used to have a cat."

"A kitty?" The boy's voice picked up immediately and Suzaku let his head fall back to look Lulu in the face.

"Yep. His name was Arthur. But I had to give him away when I came here."

"Oh… do you think he's happy without you?"

"I hope so. I'm sure he's on some orange farm right now chasing mice."

Lulu laughed at the idea, taking small handfuls of Suzaku's brown hair to keep himself balanced. "Do you think Mama would let me get a kitty?"

"Hm. Maybe! You should ask her." They finally made their way back to the fountain and Suzaku placed the boy back on the ground as he went to pick up his discarded helmet and gloves.

"Suzaku?"

"What is it Lulu?"

"Why don't you let anyone else see your face?"

Suzaku paused, turning to the boy who watched him with worried eyes. He moved close again, kneeling down to meet him eye to eye. "You're the only one Lulu. You're the only one I can trust with my secret. You can keep this secret, right?"

He nodded his head strongly, holding his hand upto his heart. "Oh course I can keep a secret! The Great Mister Zero has asked me to!" Suzaku smiled, rubbing his head before standing back up and placing the mask on his face.

"Make sure you tell me if your mother lets you get a cat."

"I promise."

'Zero' watched as the boy ran to the exit of the garden, turning around to wave at him numerous times before vanishing from his line of sight.


	3. Chapter 3

Andre Girouard was seated in the well-furnished sitting room which belonged to his family, enthralled in a book which 'Zero' had suggested that he might enjoy. He hadn't been able to put it down all morning.

He looked up at a sound coming from the doorway to see his mother walk into the room, his gray colored cat running up behind her skirts to find a place on his lap.

"Mother."

"There you are Andre. I searched all over the palace for you, I worried that you'd run away."

"Why would I do that?" He laughed, placing the book down on the couch cushions as he petted the cat on his lap.

She gave him a look before making her way over to sit beside him, picking up the hardcover book. "Where did you find this? It looks old." Lady Girouard opened the cover, her eyes focusing on the blank page that lay before her.

'To Suzaku. From Lelouch,' was written in flowery text and faded from years of wear.

"Who's book is this?"

"What? Oh I don't know. I got this from the palace library. Probably who ever donated the book." He snatched it out of her hands, not daring to say it was 'Zero' who had given it to him.

"Oh , I see." She reached out, scratching the cat behind an ear as she continued. "Have you been thinking about what your father has asked you?"

Andre closed his eyes, letting his head fall back onto the head of the couch. "I have."

"He's even spoken with Empress Nunnally about you taking a position in the court; it's an honor that you've even been considered."

"He already told me I had been guaranteed a job."

"Who did? Your father?"

"No. Zero."

"Zero? When have you spoken with Sir. Zero?"

"I speak with him often actually. He introduced himself to me a long time ago when I was a kid."

"Why didn't you…"

He turned his head to the side to look at his mother's confused face, his once clear eyes now intense as he spoke. "I didn't tell you because I thought it wasn't necessary; and it's supposed to be our secret."

"Your secret…?"

"I probably shouldn't tell you anymore." He moved to stand up, taking the cat in his arms, his book held in an armpit. "But don't worry about me Mother. I've agreed to study and take on any position the Empress will allow of me. Father will be proud, I'm sure."

"Andre…" She looked at him with worried eyes. The idea that he'd kept such a secret as to be a close confident of Zero made her wonder if he held more secrets from her than he would ever choose to tell her.

"Oh Mother, I've wanted to ask you. What do you think of the Tyrant Emperor Lelouch?"

"The Tyrant Emperor? Why would you ask about him now?"

"Do you think it would be in ill taste to wish I could be like him?"

"Andre!"

He laughed loudly, stopping and turning at the doorway. "I'm joking. No need to be so serious."

"You're still a child, please stop acting so strangely." She had tears in her eyes, but he knew better than to worry about them.

"I'll return in time for dinner." And with that he left.

She bit her lip, feeling uneasy. What was it about her son that could have possibly have caught the attention of Zero himself? He was nothing but the second child of a lady in waiting and a lowly count. She let her mind wonder to less stressing things as her daughter entered the room, carrying yards to fabric for new dresses.

Andre found Suzaku asleep outside in the grass, far out into the garden where no one bothered to stray. He let Arthur jump out of his arms, running along the ground and stopping only a foot away from Suzaku's head. Andre smirked, walking quietly up to him, kneeling down so his face hover only inches away from Suzaku's.

Before he had the chance to steal a kiss, green eyes met his own blue; forcing him to jump back in surprise. "Good afternoon, Lulu."

He felt his face flush and sat back on his heels as Suzaku sat up, letting a hand run through his wild hair. "You shouldn't try and steal kisses from sleeping people, Lulu."

"I wish you wouldn't call me Lulu anymore, Suzaku." The former Knight of Zero looked taken back at the comment, unable to hide his dislike at the request.

"Why not?"

"I'm 14 now. Couldn't you call me something not so childish?"

Suzaku laughed, not expecting such a turn in the conversation as he moved closer to the teenager, letting his hand cup his chin. "What would you like me to call you then?"

"Lelouch."

"Very well then, Lelouch." Suzaku whispered, and his lips tasted just as they had fourteen years ago.


	4. Chapter 4

Suzaku lay spread out on the ground next to the large pond which lay on the outskirts of the palace grounds, having fun teasing Arthur with a pussyfoot. Lelouch waded in the water, trying to catch fish that swam past his bony ankles.

He let out a long sigh, turning on to his back as the cat meowed loudly and pawed at his side. When had the days become so peaceful and lazy? If he could stop time at this moment, he wouldn't mind if the world decided to end.

Turning his head, he watched as Lelouch finally gave up on his quest, stepping out of water and walking up to where he lay. "It's too hard to catch those fish. They're so fast!" He collapsed onto Suzaku's chest, already out of breath.

Suzaku laughed, letting a hand run up and down the boy's back. "I bet Arther could catch some."

"Ah. I bet he could!" Lelouch set up, eyes darting over the grass in search of the cat. He frowned. "Where is he…?"

"Eh?" Suzaku sat up on his elbows, looking across the way to see the cat's familiar gray body running into the wooded area. "There he is!"

"Arthur!" Lelouch stood up, yelling after the cat who continued on his journey without looking back. "He's not listening."

"I'll go after him." Suzaku began standing up, reaching for his mask; unsure how far the cat would go before he would find him.

"Suzaku, let me."

"Lelouch, you'll never catch up with him. I'm going." The boy, just as the man that came before him, had terrible stamina.

He nodded reluctantly, watching 'Zero' run after the pet; suddenly hearing someone call out his name from behind.

'Zero' found the cat after 10 long minutes of a search and rescue; but not after having the cat bite him numerous times in the hand for ruining its fun. Making his way back to where Lelouch waited him, he came up to the boy who was staring out into the pond; drenched from head to toe.

"Lelouch, why are you all wet?"

"I met someone while you were gone."

"Someone? You mean someone was here? Did they see my face before I left?" Panic rose in his stomach, unsure how to handle such a situation.

"I don't know. They didn't say anything about that." The boy's voice sounded flat, but somehow Suzaku knew he was smiling as he spoke.

"Then what did they want?"

"They told me how I could really become like Emperor Lelouch. So that you can love me more." Suzaku shifted uneasy, letting the cat jump from his arms; watching as the boy lay down on his back; looking at him upside down.

"You're fine as you are though… Lelouch."

"I'm not Lelouch though. That's still only a nickname." He was still smiling at him, but Suzaku didn't feel better about what he was saying. "But I can't have it yet, she said I'm not allowed. I have to wait longer."

"I don't understand what you're talking about." He knelt down, cupping the boy's face with gloved hands. "Who is this person you talked to?"

"I don't know who they are, but they promised me they'd return."

"Andre, please." Suzaku called the boy by his birthname, frustrated with this game he insisted on playing with him.

"I told you," He let his hands come up to cup Suzaku's face as well, pulling him closer to is own. "Call me Lelouch." And he stole a kiss from the former knight, forcing Suzaku to close his eyes; trying to ignore the feeling that something terrible was going to happen.


	5. Chapter 5

By the time Andre had turned 18, Suzaku felt like he had begin to loose touch with his own reality.

To him, Andre was Lelouch more and more every day. In the way he spoke, in his mannerisms, in how he knew immediately when things upset him; just as Lelouch had. He was Lelouch's reincarnation for sure, he had to be. Lelouch had finally returned to him and now he wasn't alone in his burden.

Yet he wondered from time to time, when Andre made his appearances to the court and those especially in front of Nunnally, why she never commented to him on Andre's similarities to Lelouch. He never dared to bring it up, it was not his place to speak of the past with her; but this fact made him question if he had gone crazy in his depression without noticing and this child wasn't Lelouch at all. Or maybe they had all chosen to ignore it for their own sakes, because the gossip that he had taken such a liking to the boy has spread all over court quickly.

But he pushed those thoughts away as Andre entered the court, dressed elegantly in the uniform of a count. Thanks to his own influence with Nunnally, he had made sure the boy was granted a rank even higher than his father.

Andre Girouard walked to the center of the room, making his greeting to the Empress, his eyes finding contact with 'Zero' before making his way back into the crowed of nobles. 'Zero' couldn't take his eyes off the boy, finding his face in the crowd and never leaving until he was addressed by Nunnally personally.

The speakers concluded and 'Zero' ordered Schneizel to take care and accompany Nunnally with the rest of her work for the day. As he turned back to the crowd, he could have sworn he saw something familiar in his peripheral vision that made the pit of his stomach turn.

He moved through the room quickly, making his way out to the corridors and into the secret hallway that led to his privet quarters which Nunnally had specifically created for him.

He entered the pass code with ease; stepping into the room, surprised that the lights had been left on. As he removed his mask and placed it onto the tall table next to the door way, his eyes traveled slowly to a figure lazily sprawled out over his perfectly made bed.

"You."

"Hello there, Suzaku Kururugi." The girl shifted the orange doll her in arms as she sat up to smile at him.

"Suzaku Kururugi is dead."

"Very well, I guess that it true." She leaned forward and he finally noticed she was wearing a dress made for a countess. "But that doesn't stop you from living in the past now does it?"

"What are you doing here and why are you wearing that?" He could never bring himself to trust C.C., no matter how many months went by with the three of them in seclusion. No matter how many times Lelouch had told him that she was necessary and was the only person they could trust.

"You've stolen Lelouch from me." She said it in such a sad, sing-song mocking way, he wanted to throw something at her face.

"I've done nothing of the sort." He pulled at the cravat on his neck, throwing his cape and jacket onto the floor.

"I haven't been able to talk to Lelouch for so long now. And he seemed so happy to see me again when I talked to him four years ago."

"You're a liar."

"Ah." She let out a long sigh, throwing her legs over the side of the bed; resting her chin on Cheese-kun's head. "You're right, I am lying, he had no idea who I was... but you're lying to yourself if you think that child will ever be Lelouch... even so you're forcing him to become his replacement because you noticed similarities. You think he's his reincarnation, don't you? This is why I'm interested."

Suzaku looked at her with dark eyes. He wasn't going to give Lelouch to anyone, especially not this witch. "He's not yours to take."

"Lelouch hasn't fulfilled his side of our contract yet."

"Fuck your stupid contract!" He was loosing all patience he had for this woman. "Lelouch died giving me his final Geass and I've done everything in my power to keep that. Your powers aren't needed anymore. Haven't you been happy enough where ever you've been for the past 18 years?"

"It's lonely."

"Bullshit. You're just being selfish."

"And you aren't?"

"He's still a child."

"He's just as old as he was when you kill him."

"Shut up!"

"You're always so quick to anger, Suzaku." C.C. laughed and he felt like ripping out her throat.

There was a knock on the door and Suzaku turned around to see Andre walk into the room, a worried look painting his face. "Are you alright Suzaku?"

"I'm-" He turned back around to the bed, but the green haired witch was gone. He felt the stress in his back release and he looked at Andre who walked up to him, the boy resting his head in the crook of his neck.

"You're shaking Suzaku."

He closed his eyes, taking in the boy's sent that was different than what is memories told him. "Lelouch…" His voice was uneven.

Lelouch looked up at him, capturing his lips quickly; wanting to force out the demons that plagued the man he loved. "I'll be whoever you want me to be. I'll become your Tyrant Emperor. I just want to make you happy."

Suzaku closed his eyes, burring his face in the boy's dark hair, the words C.C. had said repeating again and again. Was he being selfish in forcing Lelouch's memories on him? Could he have been wrong all along in his actions? What kind of results would both of them be forced to swallow?

But as he felt Lelouch lead him over to his bed, working the the last buttons of his shirt; those thoughts were pushed away and he could have sworn the he boy's eyes looked more purple than he last remembered.


	6. Chapter 6

Suzaku pulled at Lelouch's collar, forcing the smaller body closer, relishing in the familiar frame that pushed against him. "Suzaku… someone might come and see you." His voice was breathless as he finally pulled away and it made Suzaku shudder as he took Lelouch's lips again in a hungry kiss.

"You'll be late for your meeting." Suzaku finally said pulling away, resting Zero's mask on its position on his face.

"You're the one who started molesting me," Lelouch laughed smugly, fixing his coat and running long fingers through his bangs. "And aren't you the one who has a meeting to attend with the Empress?"

'Zero' made a low growl in his throat, wishing he could just take Lelouch back to his room and stay there for the rest of the day. "Yes and she's probably wondering where I am about now…"

Lelouch walked slowly out of their hiding place, his cheeks still flushed from their earlier action. "Zero…"

"Hm? What is it?" 'Zero' moved after the younger man, fixing his gloves as he walked.

"Today I'm-"

"Sir Zero!" Schneizel's loud voice came from down the hallway and the two figures turned to meet him. "Zero… I've been searching for you. Empress Nunnally is awaiting you."

'Zero' nodded, making his way with Schneizel. "Yes, I'm sorry. I was talking with Count Girouard here. I apologize."

Schneizel made a quick bow to the Count, following 'Zero' down the hallway as he spoke on the matters at hand.

Andre watched with dark eyes as the two figures walked away, deciding he didn't feel like going to his meeting any longer.

'Zero' entered the Empress' office moments later and she greeted him with a small smile. "I had begun to worry what had become of you."

"I'm sorry your majesty." 'Zero' made a bow and closed the door completely behind him, leaving the two alone.

"Suzaku, I've wanted to ask you something."

"Your majesty please."

"We're alone, there is no problems with me calling you that." Disappointment flashed across her face as her stood up slowly, 'Zero' walking to the front of her desk.

"What is it that you would like to speak to me about?"

"Andre Girouard."

"Andre?" 'Zero' was glad that his mask was able to hide the surprised written across his face.

"Yes." Nunnally took a long breath before looking up to meet his face again. "For my own sake I've decided to ignore it, but lately I've started to worry. It's no secret that you spend much free time with this boy, and that's partly what makes me bring this up."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"You think he looks like Lelouch, don't you?"

"I- I…" He shuddered, and it gave him away.

Nunnally walked around the desk, standing beside 'Zero' who towered over her. "I didn't think it was anything when I first met him after he asked for a position in the court. I didn't want to think anything of it, mostly for my own sake, because I knew it would only bring me heartache."

She looked down and he didn't know if he should say something to comfort her.

"I think the other people of the court who still even remember my brother and think they see similarities; they have decided it would be best not to bring it up. And I agree, nothing good can come out of remembering my brother's past…"

"What does this have anything to do with me and spending time with him?"

"You're trying to replace my brother, aren't you Suzaku? You think that boy is him don't you? His… reincarnation?" He looked down at her and finally noticed she was holding his hand.

He pulled away sharply, taking a few steps closer to the center of the room. "You shouldn't do that to people…"

"Suzaku please!" He could hear her voice crack. Why was she so upset? "That boy isn't Lelouch and he never will be. You can't force him to be someone that is already gone from this world! He'll never know who my brother really was, no matter what things you tell him. How are you being fair?"

"Fair? I don't see how I'm being unfair. I've done nothing wrong."

"You're lying to yourself Suzaku!"

"I told you, stop calling me that name."

"Yet you have him call you that, don't you?"

"Your majesty, is there anything else that needs to be discussed?"

Nunnally remained standing, her head low, hands shaking. "No, there is nothing else; Zero." She finally addressed him, defeated.

"Then I will come see you later. There are plans for your trip to northern Europe next week." He closed the door slowly behind him, sure he heard her cries from behind the thick wood.


	7. Chapter 7

'Zero' moved though the palace hallways, his conversation with the Empress still whirling in his mind. How right was she? How wrong was he?

Nothing seemed to make sense anymore. He just wanted to close his eyes and have Lelouch there with him again and never have to feel lost anymore.

Maybe Nunnally was right, maybe he was expecting too much from Andre, who knew nothing than what he'd read in history books and that Lelouch had been the man he loved. He'd even told Andre that thought that he might of been Lelouch's reincarnation once, a long time ago. He had thought nothing of then, only that Andre looked so similar to Lelouch that wondered if people could be reborn. Maybe that was only the one of his many mistakes.

He closed his eyes, suddenly feeling the isolation of Zero's mask. Did Lelouch feel the same way when he wore this mask? Did he feel alone with no one to rely on?

He made his was outside onto a balcony overlooking the palace grounds. It was almost July, and almost his 36th birthday. Well, Suzaku Kururugi's 36th birthday. He gripped the railing tightly, closing his eyes. How had things become so contrived these past 10 years?

He turned around at the sounds of footsteps. Then found the answer to his question: Andre Girouard. He could never find his reasoning when that boy came close to him and was standing there, looking at him with that familiar face, driving him mad.

"What are you doing here?" His voice echoed through his mask and he couldn't bring himself to let his earlier thoughts bother him now.

"I skipped my meeting. You're already done talking with Emperess Nunnally?" Andre walked closer, handing one of the two drinks he held in his hands, knowing 'Zero' would be unable to drink it anyway.

"You really shouldn't do that Andre. Her majesty was kind enough to give you this job in the first place."

"But it was because of you."

'Zero' gripped the small drink in his hand, knowing well enough that was true. "That was only because I knew that you would be able to do the job."

Andre huffed a laugh and he leaned over the railing on his elbows, looking at nothing in particular. "Suzaku," He threw away the unnecessary formalities. "I think I've died."

Suzaku's head turned quickly to the side, but Lelouch's face remained calm. "What are you…"

"She told me that if I let Andre die then all that was left was to accept her power. It was surprisingly easy, being I was never that person to being with. All I had to do was think about you."

Suzaku just stood there, his eyes wide as Lelouch's face remained uneasily peaceful. "What have you done? Andre…"

He made a small giggle as he turned to look at Suzaku, standing up straight. That's when Suzaku finally released everything was wrong. "I've finally obtained the power of the Tyrant Emperor. My geass."

When Suzaku saw the familiar red symbol appear in the boy's eye he felt he felt nausea rush over him, again and again. Mask discarded to the ground. And then, nothing.


	8. Chapter 8

'Zero' moved though the palace hallways, his conversation with the Empress still whirling in his mind. How right was she? How wrong was he?

Nothing seemed to make sense anymore. He just wanted to close his eyes and have Lelouch there with him again and never have to feel lost anymore.

Maybe Nunnally was right, maybe he was expecting too much from Andre, who knew nothing than what he'd read in history books and that Lelouch had been the man he loved. He'd even told Andre that thought that he might of been Lelouch's reincarnation once, a long time ago. He had thought nothing of then, only that Andre looked so similar to Lelouch that wondered if people could be reborn. Maybe that was only the one of his many mistakes.

He closed his eyes, suddenly feeling the isolation of Zero's mask. Did Lelouch feel the same way when he wore this mask? Did he feel alone with no one to rely on?

He felt strong hands rest on his shoulders, a voice yelling his name and his nausea slowly subsiding. Suzaku raised his head, hands still shaking has he met eyes with the boy.

"Suzaku, are you alright? What is wrong?"

He let out a smug laugh as he turned his head away. The boys eye's were blue, but dark and unfamiliar. His forehead marked with worry lines that Lelouch would have never shown. He had be wrong and now it was too late to fix his mistakes.

"You aren't Lelouch." He said it softly at first, as if testing out the words like a child tasting something for the first time.

"What?" Andre moved closer.

"You aren't Lelouch. You never were. You're just a boy that looked like him. I could see Lelouch in you but, you never could be him; ever."

Andre pulled away quickly, eyes dancing with tears and anger flashed across his features. "What are you saying!" He was starting to yell.

Suzaku stood up slowly, his face calm, but he could feel he was on the edge of tears. "I'm sorry Andre. It seems C.C. was making fun of me his whole time. You'll never fulfill her wish and we'll never be happy as we are now."

"Suzaku please! Don't say that!" Andre ran forward, flinging himself onto Suzaku; hysterical.

"It's my own fault. I've betrayed Lelouch once again, and I've betrayed you as well, Andre."

"Don't call me that! I'm Lelouch! Please! Let me be your Lelouch!"

"But you aren't…" Suzaku let a shaky hand fall underneath his cape to find the gun he had hidden underneath the layers.

"But this geass! It can fix everything!"

"There is nothing good that comes out of a selfish geass. Lelouch taught me that. You have no will to pass on to anyone."

"Suzaku…" The boy's voice cracked and Suzaku knew he was considering using his geass on him. He pulled him up so Andre's face was only inches away from his own and whispered against his lips.

"But it should be ok if I have one last kiss, right Lelouch?"

As their lips met, Suzaku let his finger close tightly against the trigger and he tasted blood in the boy's mouth. He let silent tears fall down his checks as the boy slumped to the floor and he dropped the gun and walked away.

On the morning when he turned 40 he coughed up blood. But he only smiled weakly at the fact his body was finally giving up what his will had long thrown away. He had guessed he had been sick for awhile now, but enjoyed letting things take their course than wishing to live longer than needed.

He had gone to see Nunnally immediately on that day and with a sad face had told him that 'Zero' was now dead and unneeded in this new world. So he had taken the few items he ever owned and found himself a small home out in the country side where no one would find him.

The last 4 years had been lonely, but no where as lonely as he had felt before. When we read the news that a young count in the Britannian government was shot by a terrorist, he wanted to thank Nunnally for not tainting the last thing Lelouch had left both of them.

He closed his eyes, letting out a long shaky breath before turning his head to look out the window; only to be blocked by a figure standing before him.

"Nice to see you again, Suzaku Kururuigi."

"Oh you've come to make fun of a dying man now, C.C.?"

"I just thought it would have been appropriate to have at least someone here to say goodbye too."

"I have no one left to say that to."

She said nothing and he continued to stare at her, her long green hair pulled up high on her head and wearing a blue peasant dress.

"You never gave him a geass did you?" He turned away, letting a smile form on his lips.

"He had whatever you wanted him to have, remember?"

"I killed him again, I killed Lelouch again. Even when he had done nothing wrong."

"Such is your fate in this lifetime."

"This lifetime...?" His eyes stayed focused on the ceiling, as if considering just what that meant.

"I'm sure in another life when both of you are reborn you will for sure have a happy ending."

"And what about you?" He looked at her blankly. "Are you happy living as you are?"

"Lelouch fulfilled my wish. I just want to watch the world move on peacefully now." She held nothing in her hands, no suitcase, no Cheese-kun. Suzaku wondered where she had come from all of the sudden.

"Of course." The room was silent until he coughed again, blood trickling down his ruff chin.

"You're dying and yet," She said suddenly, still feet away from his bed.

"This geass continues to activate, wanting me to live. Even after he's dead, he won't let me follow after him." He laughed bitterly, bring up a hand to wipe away the warm liquid.

"He wanted you to be happy."

"I know. But, how can a man with no past or future ever be happy?"

"He believed you were strong enough."

"He thought too highly of me." He shifted under the covers, feeling tired once more.

"If you have nothing else to say to me, I'd like to sleep more."

"Very well, then I'll bid my farewell."

"Goodbye." His breath became low and unsteady has he fell into unconsciousness.

"I'm sure you'll be happy again, Suzaku Kururugi." And the witch was gone.


End file.
